As it is, I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because
you were grieved into repenting. For you felt a godly grief, so that you
suffered no loss through us. For godly grief
produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret,
whereas worldly grief produces death. (2 Cor. 7:9-10, ESV)
In 2 Corinthians 7, the apostle Paul speaks of two kinds of
grief or sorrow. There is godly grief
that produces a repentance that leads to salvation. There is also a worldly grief that does not
and cannot lead to salvation, but rather brings only death. The question a passage like that prompts in
us is this: When we get caught in sin,
how do we respond? Do we respond with
regret (worldly sorrow) or repentance (godly sorrow)?
You see, there is a great deal of difference between regret
and repentance. In his book, The
Peacemaking Pastor, Alfred Poirier does a great job differentiating between
the two. What is the difference between
regret and repentance?
1. Regret runs from God, repentance runs
to God. When we are merely regretful
about sin, we typically try to cover it up.
We are regretful that we got caught, and because the regretful person is
more concerned about man’s opinion than God’s opinion, we do things like cover
our sin, try to win sympathy or garner support for our views. Repentance on the other hand has no desire to
hide our sin, rather the repentant person exposes it, first to God (Ps. 51:1),
and then to others (James 5:16). The
repentant person runs toward the cleansing and forgiveness found in God through
Jesus Christ.
2. Regret seeks to make atonement,
repentance accepts atonement. The
regretful person often has a guilty conscience and seeks to repair the
damage. Sometimes they offer substitutes
for their sin, like directing attention to all the good things they have
done. Repentance does not try to atone,
but recognizes and receives the atonement offered through the sacrifice of
Jesus Christ.
3. Regret sorrows over our failure to
achieve, repentance sorrows over the state of our hearts. Regret forces a person to admit that they are
not as great as they thought. Often they
say that they cannot believe they did what they did. They insist they are not that kind of person. They pledge never to do it again. The repentant person knows that statements
like these are only attempts to cover up the true state of one’s heart. The repentant person recognizes their own
sinfulness and grieves over the state of their heart. Like Paul, they cry out, “Wretched man that I
am! Who will deliver me from this body
of death?” (Rom. 7:24)
4. Regret leads to self-righteousness and/or
self-condemnation, repentance leads to Christ’s righteousness. The one who is regretful is often quick to beat
themselves up, to beat others up, to resent others, to take offense easily and
to point out the faults of others. The
regretful person either displays an unhealthy self-loathing or an arrogant
self-righteousness. The repentant person
rejoices that what they could never achieve, Christ already did achieve. They rejoice in the fact that while their sin
is serious, because of Jesus they are not condemned. (Rom. 8:1) As a result, they are free to glory in
Christ’s perfect obedience and love.
5. Regret moves a person away from the
people of God, repentance moves a person toward the people of God. When our attitude is merely regretful, true
reconciliation never really happens.
Regretful people are unwilling to do what is necessary to bring
reconciliation – to truly confess the depths of their sin and humbly, gently
seek the forgiveness of others.
Repentance leads a person to just that – to recognize the pain their sin
has caused in others and to approach them with the goal of forgiveness and true
reconciliation.
So, what will it be the next time you are caught in a
sin? Will it be a regret that is only
sorry about getting caught and leads us away from God’s provision and
people? Or will it be a repentance that
recognizes our sin, and throws ourselves on the mercy, grace, forgiveness and
righteousness provided in Jesus Christ?
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